New to the area. Would like to meet.

Handy restaurant recap

Online dating is worth £14.5 billion in the UK alone. Sadly, five years ago, we didn't decide to go into the e-dating business. We went into the ever so slightly more niche "best things to do in Birmingham condensed into one, free weekly email" business. You live and learn, right? Still, someone needs to keep you posted on the new openings in this ever-changing, ever-blossoming town and below, we're doing just that. Five sparkly-new restaurants, weirdly and inexplicably presented in the form of online dating profiles. Swipe right.

Username: The Ivy Brasserie; D.O.B: April 11, 2018
Location: Temple Row, dah-ling
About me: I've made the big move from London but brought some of my best-known moves with me: think prawn cocktail, shepherd's pie and a whole grilled lobster. I've invested a lot in making myself look good and it shows.
Would like to meet: A classic British beauty. Likes to see and be seen.
HOOK ME UP

Username: The Wilderness; D.O.B: April 11, 2018
Location: 27 Warstone Lane, Jewellery Quarter
About me: I've recently relocated to the JQ from Southside. My new look is super sleek, and although it's pretty hard to land a date with me right now, if you're patient, I'll fit you in.
Would like to meet: An adventurer with a dark side. Should thrive on change, but never compromise on quality.
HOOK ME UP

Name: Comptoir Libanais; D.O.B: March 26, 2018
Location: Central. Grand Central.
About me: Though you can find me around the country, I look at my beautiful best above New Street Station. I love Lebanese and Middle Eastern food and for our first date, I'd like to share a mezze platter (£16.95), followed by a mixed grill (£13.95), so come hungry because my portions are something to behold, and I'm a sharing kind.
Would like to meet: Someone who enjoys home-cooking, but also likes the idea of trips to the souks of places like Beirut, Marrakesh and Istanbul. Via Birmingham.
HOOK ME UP

Username: Kilder; D.O.B: April 20, 2018
Location: 5 Shaws Passage, Digbeth
About me: Hey! I've just moved in next to my big bro, who is a total fox and cool AF. You've probably heard of him — OPM. And though we're really close (neighbours in fact), I'm all about natural wine and seasonal British produce — think cured meat, cheese boards and small plates: this vibe. I've also got 15 beers by the tap, so you're going to like me.
Would like to meet: You should probably be into facial hair, tattoos and beanies. You'll need to be okay with the fact I work Wednesdays to Sundays but my diary's wide open otherwise, and for the right guy, I can get a lot of comp'd burgers.
HOOK ME UP

Username: Revolución de Cuba; D.O.B: March 29, 2018
Location: 8 Temple Street
About me: I'm from such a big family, sometimes it feels like my reputation as a next gen member of Revolution precedes me, and not in a good way. But I'm worth a try. On food, get my crispy squid tacos (£5.75). For cocktails, it's all about my blood orange margarita (£8.75). And absolutely check out my top floor — it's super spacious, chandelier-laden and a lot of fun come the weekends.
Would like to meet: Someone who's looking for a good time and isn't afraid of late nights. Dancing non-optional.
HOOK ME UP

MORE BRUM GOODNESS

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Once a month (or more) we walk into a restaurant and ask the staff to order for us

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Care of Town Hall and Symphony Hall